Is it normal that I didn’t fight back or run away? Yes. When faced with extreme danger, the brain and body often default to automatic survival reflexes like freezing, dissociating, or tonic immobility (a state of temporary physical paralysis) rather than fight-or-flight. Not fighting back is a biological survival response, not a choice or a sign of consent.
Why is my memory of the event fragmented or out of order? Traumatic stress affects how the brain encodes information. The amygdala (the brain's emotional alarm system) can override the prefrontal cortex, leading to intense recall of central details while time-sequences, chronological order, or peripheral details are foggy or scrambled. Fragmented memories are normal and do not mean you are lying.
What are ways I can cope with my thoughts and feelings?
Build a support system - Having a solid support system is crucial for healing and it can feel hard to share with people that you were the victim of sexual violence. Reach out to at least one person you trust to share your feelings, gain encouragement and connect with others who have had similar experiences.
Practice self-care - Engage in activities that bring you joy, relaxation, and a sense of confidence, compassion, or productivity. This may include exercise, meditation, journaling or involvement in hobbies and interests.
Establish boundaries - Being aware of your own needs and limits and communicating them to others can help you feel more in control.
Grounding techniques - After a traumatic event, your nervous system may have difficulty resetting. Meditation, paced breathing, progressive muscle relaxation and movement may help you stay present and manage strong emotions or numbness that may arise during recovery.
